Not Feeling It...

  Once again, Christmastime is upon us and I am just not feeling it.  This has been a particularly hard couple of weeks for me so the exhaustion is fraying the nerves.  I want rest not the hustle and bustle of holidays.  Then again, this hustle and bustle will not last and I shall then wish it was here again.  The brain is never satisfied!  It is to be an unusually quiet holiday season around the Bayou, this year as, once again, Mark has to be away and the grandlittles cannot come from the island.  Son and I will putter about the place and hope that Darling Daughter can take off of work at the senior care center long enough to share at least Christmas Day with us.  The effort of decorating seems almost pointless but I am going through the motions.  Hopefully, my mood will brighten once I start poking bits of "Christmas" in every nook and cranny of the Little Bayou House.

  This morning, I spent my time putting ornaments on the tree.  The tree stands in the middle of the room so can be viewed from all sides.  This gives me the opportunity to sit and admire the beauty from different angles but, also, makes each misplaced light stand out like a sore thumb.  I have been rearranging lights and ornaments all day.  In fact, I think I have spent more time "fixing" the tree than actually decorating it.

  For the past ten years or so, the "theme" has been a country Christmas but, since "farmhouse" everything has caught on with a rage, I had to be a bit different.  The tree is now decorated with ornaments from "Christmases Past" which suits me fine.  I am old. Why not have old decorations?  In fact, it sort of suits the living room since the entire thing is filled with "old".  Old furniture, old clocks, old lamps, old me...we all fit.  

  By the time I complete the Little Bayou House's transformation to Christmas, my spirits will have lifted and things will be easier.  The peace of the season will settle around the Bayou and make the old brain thankful for what is here even though I shall miss what is not.