"Not For Human Consumption"

  Have you ever wondered just what they do to items that should be edible but are labeled "Not for human consumption"?   I never thought much of it until the past week or so.  After Halloween, Mark and I were wandering around one of the local stores when I came across an aisle full of seasonal decorations.  Well, Halloween is one of my favorite holidays so I racked up on wreaths, garlands and such.  Mark...well, he bought some of that Indian corn thinking it may be something I could plant.  I shrugged my shoulders and agreed that it might be interesting.  Now, I am not so sure.

  Back on Christmas Eve, the sweet Grand Princess suddenly exclaimed that we had to feed Santa's reindeer.  "MawMaw, do you have any reindeer food?"  Umm, well, maybe?  I did a bit of quick thinking and had the brilliant idea!  The Indian corn!  We had exactly enough ears for the reindeer!  Eight for the regular crew and one for Rudolf!  How could we go wrong??  I figured corn being corn would quickly draw every raccoon in the county to our yard and what they did not devour, the local deer population would finish off before morning.  Out we went to hang the lovely ears of corn on the driftwood trees that line the board path.  The kiddos were elated and I felt assured that all was well.  My ease soon turned to anxiety when about 2am, the corn was still intact.  Nary a critter came to eat the corn.  On the other hand, a few feet away, the sunflower seeds in the bird feeder were gone!  Nothing wanted to eat that corn!  Son, being a fine uncle to these tots, climbed out of bed, went out barefooted in the cold to wrestle with that corn.  He twisted and turned the kernels enough to make it appear that the reindeer feasted.

  Now weeks later, the corn is still dangling from the post.  What was done to that corn to make it unappetizing to critters?  Coons eat anything!  Anything except things marked "Not for human consumption" obviously.  Smart critters?  Anyway, Mark will be happy to know that a healthy crop of corn has sprouted on the ground where the kernels were dropped.  Perhaps I should salvage the rest of the corn to put in the garden next spring.  Maybe the coons will leave it alone and I can have lovely Indian corn for Halloween decorations!  It is worth a try and maybe it will be a tad more appetizing for the critters come a later date.  Of course, with the grandlittles not coming to the Bayou next Christmas, there won't be a lot of need for reindeer food.