Golf on the Gulf!

  While I do not even know how to play golf, I have a lovely collection of the balls.  Those white spheres with the little dimples are just so darn cute that I cannot help myself.  I gather them like Easter Eggs and display them in canisters about the Little Bayou House.  Not really.  I do not collect golf balls any more than I do basketballs but gathering them is something that I do occasionally.  I find them hidden about the yard and do not wish to shoot them out the side of my lawnmower when I am doing yardwork.  So, I gather....I do not collect.  There is a difference.  AND no canisters are involved but the balls are stored in a cardboard box until I find just what to do with them.

  Golf on the Gulf is probably not a real tournament nor should I be calling this Golf on the "Gulf".  Golf on the Bayou just did not have a catchy ring to it.  The golfing part is true...the balls are real but the tournament is part of my imagination.  You see, my neighbor across the Bayou obviously does golf and obviously does have a pretty nice swing. His yard is directly across the Bayou and without a doubt he practices his swing by hitting the balls my way.  This is all fine and dandy for the ones that reach all the way across the marsh but I can only imagine how many thousands of balls are dotting the marshes of the Bayou.  Mr. Neighbor-Across-the-Bayou practices a lot.

  While this is all sort of humorous when I am out picking up the balls, it could possibly be rather devastating for the critters.  Imagine all of the critters that may think that pretty white ball is an egg and looks a lot like supper.  Just how many golf balls can a gator or turtle eat before something goes amiss in their gut?  Then I ponder if the golf balls are mounding up in some weird mountain or if they are sinking beneath mud and filling in the waterways?  Shouldn't this be considered littering?  Or am I just being the curmudgeon who lives on the other side of the Bayou?  Still, I gather what balls I can retrieve and toss them in the box with the dozens of others.  Perhaps some day, I will venture over and try to sell Mr. Neighbor-Across-the-Bayou a lovely bunch of sparkling white golf balls so he can practice some more!

Golf Balls, Puffballs and Billy Goats!

I know what you are thinking..what in the world do these three things have in common? Well..they don't have anything in common.. or do they? In most people's worlds, they do not but then again, I am not "most people". So consequently, in my world these three things are all so intertwined that they become one big ole mess of similarity. First, let me start with the golf balls. I do not golf..chasing a little white ball around a field (that could better be used as a garden space) seems remotely inane to me. Nor do I live near a golf course. Yet, here lately as I am cutting grass, I randomly find new golf balls in my yard. Where they come from, I do not know. Perhaps a neighbor across the Bayou has a really good swing? Perhaps some large bird such as the osprey is picking them up at a golf course somewhere only to drop them in my yard? Or perhaps BP tried to plug the oil spill with them and they blew here with the sheer force of the erupting oil and gas??? I have no clue..it remains a mystery. I do pick them up when I find them which leads me to this morning. I was hauling a load of mulch in the old pickup when I drove over a "golf ball". (Hint..notice the quotes! Maybe you can see where I am going with this.) Anyway, after working several hours with the mulch, I went back to retrieve the ball. To my surprise, it was not a golf ball at all but rather a perfect specimen of Puffball! For those not familiar with Puffballs, they are a type of mushroom that has an interior of spore-bearing flesh. When mature it sort of splits open at the top and the spores poof out when anything (raindrops, wind, passing animals or curious youngsters) disturbs the mushroom. It was a perfectly round Puffball just the same size as a golfball and was the whitest white mushroom I have ever seen. Gorgeous! It had a wonderful texture on the outside that reminded me of the Epcot Center but adding that one to the list would have been just too much! Anyway..now you see how the golf balls and Puffballs are related in my story!

Now for the Billy goats..how do they fit into this tale? Well, my mind seems to ramble when things interest me and this Puffball claimed my attention for quite some time. As I sat there taking picture after picture of the lovely fungi (there were several of all stages of maturity!), my mind traveled back in time. Back to a time of sitting on the front porch of my childhood home listening to stories being told by my dad. He would tell the most fascinating tales of his boyhood. One of these stories involved a neighbor's goats. It seems that Dad had visited this neighbor and had received a warning of the mean Billy goat. Being the curious lad he was, he ventured back to the barn where the goats were mingling. I can imagine he did a bit more than just view the goats as one decided to give chase. Dad..the lad..ran from the goat to the nearest escape. The ladder to the hayloft of the old barn would surely rescue him from the galloping goat! He climbed the ladder and flopped in the soft hay thinking he had outwitted the wily critter. Not so..the goat merely climbed the ladder behind him! Aha! He would wait until the goat got to the top and then jumping down, he would be free. All went according to plan, Dad..the lad..was now safely in the barnyard again and the goat was in the hayloft! Not for long..for around the corner came the goat..head down ready to make connection with the backside of a young man that more or less instigated the attack. Not knowing what else to do, this young man reached down and picked up..yes..a large Puffball! When the Billy goat got near enough, poof! The Puffball spores made contact with its nose and caused a sneezing attack from the poor goat and a laughing attack from Dad! A sure case of "boys will be boys"! And that is how the Billy goat became tied in with the Puffballs and golf balls in today's post! Note..if you look closely in the last picture you can see the spores poofing out of the Puffball as I poked it with a stick!